How to Please Your I.T. Department

1. When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, bowling trophies and children's art. We don't have a life, and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleeting glimpse of yours.

2. Don't write anything down. Ever. We can play back the error messages from here.

3. When I.T. support sends you an E-Mail with high importance, delete it at once. We're just testing.

4. When the photocopier doesn't work, call computer support. There's electronics in it.

5. When the printer won't print, re-send the job at least 20 times. Print jobs frequently get sucked into black holes.

6. Don't learn the proper term for anything technical. We know exactly what you mean by "My thingy blew up".

7. When an I.T. person says he's coming right over, go for coffee. That way you won't be there when we need your password. It's nothing for us to remember 700 screen saver passwords.

8. Don't use on-line help. On-line help is for wimps.

Actually from the user's point of view, you can do whatever you want with your PC or laptop as long as you don't call IT afterwards. But that's no fun is it?